Base Your Life Around These Four Priorities…
Posted On April 20, 2018
Relationships tend to tell it all! Tell me whose respect matters most to you and I’ll tell you your priorities. How many times have you seen it? A man is revered by his peers and community; everyone adores him. Only to find out that his marriage, or some other vital relationship, is dangling by a string…a tattered string if I might add.
What has happened? How is it that people outside of his home could love him so, but those that are closes to him in proximity have no connection. No respect. No admiration. Instead, resentment and disassociation.
Yikes! Can you relate?
I’m sure that most King’s Digest readers can relate to the fact that there is an insurmountable level of responsibility for men when it comes to tending to the relationships closest to you… but what does that look like day to day?
We break it down into what we know as The Four Priorities. As leaders, our priorities are typically based around people. In fact people probably would not follow us if they didn’t believe we had a genuine concern about their well being. That means our objectives should be to create task lists that serve those which give us the privilege of leading them. As a result of shaping our priorities around people we empower them to do more, we affirm their presence in our lives, and we get more accomplished!
I first discovered The Four Priorities when I was given a book by Larry Kreider, former President of The Gathering, a powerful Christian organization based out of Orlando, FL. The book is written from a biblical context and establishes four core focal points of a man’s life:
- Personal Development
I am a man of faith and I live by these principles myself, however whether you are a believer in Christ or not, you will be able to agree that these four priorities are necessary to carry out any great task on this earth. You see, nothing great is done by one man. And I don’t care how much technology you build, it won’t out do the potential that humans bring to the table. Especially if leadership is something you expect to be great at.
1. Personal Development
For most of us, we have presuppositions about how life works. These presuppositions formulate the principles you believe deepest. Those principles are what make up your moral compass; the laws by which you govern yourself. As we develop and progress our laws should consistently change, or become more concrete. We should be consistently developing our perception of life, and evaluating our paradigms from which we view life.
Your core principles will also determine your quality of life. It is from these principles that you will attract and repel people and circumstances. The people of your life will determine your progress. Developing your core principles is what shapes your mindset. That is why it is critical that we continue to read, learn, and be exposed to new things. There is an old proverb that says, “Travel is detrimental to ignorance.” When you can’t travel, READ! The average CEO reads 2-4 books a month. What steps are you taking to equip your mental space?
Your physical health is just as important as your mental health. What good does it do your mind to be smart if your body is no good? How much could you truly experience life? The focus should be adding value to yourself FIRST, so that you can share the benefits of your growth with all others.
Personal development also includes your faith. Whether you believe in God or not, you have faith, because you believe in something. (You surely would be reading from this magazine if you didn’t!) In the event you are a person of faith, then you believe that faith involves consulting with God about life. It is through interaction with God that our belief system evolves. This is personal development at it’s best because… the majority of time… God is consulting with us about OURSELVES!
Remember when I was talking about the man that struggles to have a work/life balance? The majority of time it boils down to the fact that he has lost track of where his priority as a leader lies. That is in serving those that give us the privilege of leading them. This priority goes to our family first! You see a king’s desire is that those that are closest respect him the most! That means we must focus on pouring into our spouse and children, before anyone else. This is the foundation of leadership.
Family teaches us how to manage the relationships that see our flaws the most! Humility is always found close to family because the majority of the time they are still willing to love us through our short comings. The man that negates serving these individuals to please those outside of his home, ultimately risks the chance of losing everything.
3. Friends- Commitment to Relationships
While life can become a fast pursuit of wealth and possessions, we must not focus on strengthening the bottom line to the point that we sacrifice the most valuable asset of all- personal relationships.
“I don’t want my life to be how I took experiences…but that I gave exceedingly.” – Ann Voskamp
I know that some people will have discrepancies with this priority. And I would question strongly whether they were true leaders. In leadership we have no choice but to deal with people. It is an art form that we grow to master. However, because of the effort relationships require we tend to put them on the back burner. Relationships force us to change, and require sacrifice that we often do not want to commit to. That’s why I love working with other leaders. They understand, and have embraced the fact that sacrifice is just a part of the lifestyle when we are people of influence.
Aside from the burdens one may place on relationships, the benefits are massive! We are interdependent creatures designed to collaborate and connect with others. Once we make a commitment to self development and begin to serve people, we naturally deepen our relationships. There is amazing power that comes from a likeminded community pursuing the objective of serving one another. In our fast-paced, highly-technical world of social media, we have never been so “connected” to one another…but so out of touch personally. Frankly put, our relationships with most people we are “connected” to is shallow at best. The third priority frames the focus around authentic, face-to-face, heart-to-heart, life-on-life human relationships. The kind technology can’t produce and are essential for strengthening our culture.
This is why I fell in love with Masterminds, which I host on a bi-weekly basis with male leaders through out Central Florida. Book an appointment to learn more about how you can join a Mastermind.
4. Purpose- Completing the Work
The entire purpose of one growing, learning, and connecting is to inherently pour out. Pour out our wisdom, expertise, and skill set onto the lives of others that we may all benefit.
There may be some variables but for the most, we are called to be solutions to the problems of other people. When we begin to view all people as someone that can benefit from our help, we then take a different approach to our neighbors. They are no longer strangers, but instead they become opportunities to serve. When we are focused on completed the purpose for our lives we no longer see social problems as someone else’s responsibility, but from the desire to bring a solution.
We all have a purpose to fulfill on this earth, and that purpose will require passion for it to be accomplished. You can rest assured that whatever the work is for you to complete, you will be passionate about it. You have to if you are going to lead others. It is your zeal and enthusiasm that will compel others to follow you.
So now, even if you are not necessarily where you want to be in life, doing what you want to be doing; you can begin to activate the gifts inside of you. You can stir your passions. Life will make room for you because you are enhancing the natural flow for everyone else by doing what you where created to do.
Let’s do our best to activate the Four Priorities in our lives. Helping to advance the relationships that matter most to us.